Today is the day, folks.  Today? - Is 14 weeks!

Some sources claim 12 weeks the start of the second trimester, some claim 13 and others 14.  I err on the side of caution and say 14.  And now, here I am!

Yesterday I was 13 weeks pregnant, next week I'll be 15 and today I'm 14.  What's so great about that?  I mean, it's just another week.  Except, not to me.  Let me explain.

There's something about having worked SO hard for something that makes it that much... not more valuable but in this case, I was so much more afraid to lose it that in previous situations.  Meaning:  this time around, the idea of miscarrying has been much more in the forefront of my mind than with my girls - my "easy" conceptions and pregnancies.  Not that we didn't want them (give me a break!) or weren't excited, but I just didn't think about it.  This time around, the pregnancy was a long time in the making and I guess with that comes the fear that it could also be taken away.  Hitting the second trimester, chances of miscarrying reassuringly drop.

Did I ever even have vague symptoms of miscarriage this time around?  Not even a one.  But the emotional investment, after the shock of secondary infertility has caused feelings I wouldn't have expected.

Also, I'm starting to feel human again.  Or, at least I would if it weren't for my allergies.  Allergies (sinus and ear trouble) tend to be worse with pregnancy but nearly every other nasty symptom I've experienced (nausea, dizziness, extreme tiredness, fatigue, sore/itchy parts that need not be mentioned, killer heart burn) this time around started to ease off last week. I've made dinner more, I've ventured out of the house more, I've mothered my children from a more upright position NOT on the couch... the past week has been so much better than the previous 9.

I shutter to think that I had 9 weeks of feeling that junky.

Plus, I've been feeling the baby move.  He's a night owl - just like... one of the girls.  I think it was Mer.  Or maybe it just when I'm most still and calm.  Heaven knows I didn't get much chance to be still and calm with I was expecting Mer. 

It's amazing how differnt things are this time around.  Gwenna pats my belly, asks for the baby is eating, Mer asks everyone if they were a naked baby (the "no clothes" thing - that this baby is in my belly, naked, amazes her) and gives the baby kisses.  I'm starting to love it, I'm starting to remember that I love being pregnant and I hope the whole second trimester feels more this way. 

I could definitely deal with more of that and less of ... less of what we're kissing goodbye. 


The Browns said...

YAY!!! Congrats! I'm glad you're doing better. Being a sick mommy is a horrible position to be in!

Suzanne M said...

Congratulations on your second trimester! My silly question for you has to do with the sidebar. I didn't know your pcos diagnosis was false. How did you find that out? Just curious. :)